Yo mama's so fat,
I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her good side.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
hauls ass, she has to make two trips.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
hauls ass, she has friends come help.
Yo mama's so fat, I've got
to tell two snaps just to cover her fat ass.
Yo mama's so fat, she's 36-24-36...
but that's her forearm, neck, and thigh!
Yo mama's so fat, she's 36-24-36...
but that's in feet.
Yo mama's so fat, they had
to grease a door frame and hold a Twinkie on the other side to get her
through.
Yo mama's so fat, she can
lay down and stand up and her height doesn't change.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
dances, she makes the band skip.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
walks across the living room, the radio skips.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
played hide-n-go-seek, she hid behind a water tower.
Yo mama's so fat, the horse
on her Polo shirt is real.
Yo mama's so fat, the horse
on her Jordache jeans is real.
Yo mama's so fat, she's not
kidding when she says "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!"
Yo mama's so fat, on Halloween
she says "Trick or meatloaf!"
Yo mama's so fat, on Halloween
she trick or treats two houses at a time.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
opens the refrigerator, it says "I give up!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she
opens the refrigerator, it says "Uncle!"
Yo mama's so fat, Fat Albert
gave her the rights to say "Hey, hey, hey!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she
ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave her a dinosaur.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
ordered a "My Size Meal" at McDonald's they gave her the key to the store.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
went to Burger King and asked for a Whopper, they gave her the sign.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
works at the movie theater, she works as the screen.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
runs she makes the CD player skip... at the radio station.
Yo mama's so fat, her belly
jiggle is the first ever perpetual motion machine.
Yo mama's so fat, all the
restaurants in town have signs that say:
"Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons
OR Yo Mama"
Yo mama's so fat, when she
ran away, they had to use all four sides of the milk carton.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
ran away, they had to put her picture on the milk truck.
Yo mama's so fat, you can't
even see her legs, it just looks like she's gliding across the floor.
Yo mama's so fat, instead
of Levis 501 jeans, she wears Levi's 1002's.
Yo mama's so fat, instead
of wide leg jeans, she wears wide load.
Yo mama's so fat, she was
in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade... wearing ropes.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't
wear a G-String, she wears an A, B, C, D, E, F, G-String.
Yo mama's so fat, she fills
up the bath tub, and then she turns on the water.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses
diet soap.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to use a lawn chair instead of a Thigh Master.
Yo mama's so fat, she went
to sit down and the chair begged for mercy.
Yo mama's so fat, all of
her clothes have to be custom made by a contractor.
Yo mama's so fat, when I
said I wanted "Pigs in a blanket" she got back in bed.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease, the doctor gave her 5 years
to live.
Yo mama's so fat, she doesn't
have a doctor, she has a grounds keeper.
Yo mama's so fat, she doesn't
have love handles, she has a roll bar.
Yo mama's so fat, she was
born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
Yo mama's so fat, she's got
smaller fat women orbiting around her.
Yo mama's so fat, a picture
of her fell off the wall!
Yo mama's so fat, her picture
takes two frames.
Yo mama's so fat, I saw a
picture of her in a magazine on page 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8.
Yo mama's so fat, when I
yell "Kool-Aid," she comes crashing through the wall.
Yo mama's so fat, she could
sell shade.
Yo mama's so fat, her cereal
bowl came with a lifeguard.
Yo mama's so fat, she's larger
than life.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes
Big Bird look like a rubber duck.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
crosses the street, cars look out for her.
Yo mama's so fat, she puts
mayonaise on aspirin.
Yo mama's so fat, people
jog around her for exercise.
Yo mama's so fat, I ran around
her twice and got lost.
Yo mama's so fat, she's once,
twice, three times a lady.
Yo mama's so fat, she gets
runs in her jeans.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
was walking in her jeans I swear I smelled something burning.
Yo mama's so fat, I gotta
take three steps back just to see all of her.
Yo mama's so fat, her ass
has it's own congressman.
Yo mama's so fat, she shops
for clothes in the local tent shop.
Yo mama's so fat, her favorite
blouse is a tent.
Yo mama's so fat, she deep-fries
her toothpaste.
Yo mama's so fat, her favorite
food is seconds.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
stepped on a train track, the warning lights went on.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
goes to the circus she sees the big top and asks "Where can I try that
on?"
Yo mama's so fat, when she
goes to the circus she takes up all the rings.
Yo mama's so fat and old
that when God said "Let there be Light", he told her to move her fat ass
out of the way.
Yo mama's so fat, even God
couldn't raise her spirits.
Yo mama's so fat that she
has TB... two bellies.
Yo mama's so fat, at the
zoo, the elephants started throwing her peanuts.
Yo mama's so fat, the animals
at the zoo feed her.
Yo mama's so fat, when your
father mounts her, his ears pop.
Yo mama's so fat, "Place
Your Ad Here" is printed on each of her butt cheeks.
Yo mama's so fat, every time
she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
plays football she plays the interior line.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to keep pesos in one pocket and yen in the other.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
wears heels, they're flats by the afternoon.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
leaves the beach everybody shouts "The coast is clear."
Yo mama's so fat, she wakes
up in sections.
Yo mama's so fat, her blood
type is rocky-road.
Yo mama's so fat, her blood
type is Ragu.
Yo mama's so fat, her college
graduation picture was an aerial.
Yo mama's so fat, her yearbook
picture is an aerial.
Yo mama's so fat, her driver's
license says "Picture continued on other side."
Yo mama's so fat, they used
her for a trampoline at the Olympics.
Yo mama's so fat, she looks
like she's smuggling a Volkswagon.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
put on some BVD's by the time they reached her waist they spelled "BouleVarD."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
auditioned for a part in "Indiana Jones," she got the part as the big rolling
ball.
Yo mama's so fat, she goes
to a restaurant, looks at the menu, and says "Okay."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
brought her dress to the cleaners, they said "Sorry, we don't do curtains."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.
Yo mama's so fat, when I
finished having sex with her and tried to roll off, I was still on her.
Yo mama's so fat, I had to
roll over twice to get off of her.
Yo mama's so fat, if she
got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his word for it!
Yo mama's so fat, she's got
Amtrak tattooed on her leg.
Yo mama's so fat, when the
police showed her a picture of her feet, she couldn't identify them.
Yo mama's so fat, she freebases
ham.
Yo mama's so fat, we got
her in the drive-in free by dressing her as a Chevy.
Yo mama's so fat, she went
on a light diet... As soon as it's light she starts eating.
Yo mama's so fat, she's on
a new diet... slim slow.
Yo mama's so fat, she ain't
on a diet, she's on a triet... She be like "What ya'll eating? I'll try
it!"
Yo mama's so fat, she went
on a seafood diet... Whenever she saw food she ate it.
Yo mama's so fat, she could
go a week without eating and still not lose weight.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't
lose weight, only find it.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
bends over we go into daylight savings time.
Yo mama's so fat, she's half
Indian, half Irish, and half American.
Yo mama's so fat, she got
it goin' on... and on and on and on.
Yo mama's so fat, when I
climbed up on top of her, I burned my ass on the lightbulb.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
goes to an office, they tell her to pull up a sofa.
Yo mama's so fat, if she
wears fishnet stockings, they'd better be 50 pound test!
Yo mama's so fat, the telephone
company gave her two area codes.
Yo mama's so fat, they have
to run a relay race to get her belt through her belt loops.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to put her belt on with a boomerang.
Yo mama's so fat, her belt
size is the equator.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears
an asteroid belt.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
her own area code.
Yo mama's so fat, her ass
looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
turns around, people throw her a welcome back party.
Yo mama's so fat, when I
was done I rolled over, over again, and I was still on top of the bitch.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't
even jump to a conclusion.
Yo mama's so fat, if she
weighed five more pounds, she could get group insurance!
Yo mama's so fat, when she
went to the Rose Parade they thought she was a float.
Yo mama's so fat, she went
to Sizzler and got a group discount.
Yo mama's so fat, she made
weight watchers go blind.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears
a watch on each arm, one for each timezone.
Yo mama's so fat n black,
she jumped in the ocean and they thought she was an oil spill.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to wear a three piece bathing suit.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped
in the ocean and the ocean jumped back and said "I'll wait my turn."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
plays football she play offense and defense.
Yo mama's so fat, her nickname
is "Damn."
Yo mama's so fat, the back
of her neck looks like a pack of hot-dogs.
Yo mama's so fat, your daddy
had to roll her in flower and look for the wet spot.
Yo mama's so fat, she broke
her leg and gravy dripped out.
Yo mama's so fat, I shot
the bitch and Crisco came out.
Yo mama's so fat, she DJ's
for the ice cream truck.
Yo mama's so fat, I tried
to fuck her doggy style but I was just ridin' piggy back.
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped
on a talking scale and it told her to "Get the fuck off."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped
on a talking scale and it told her "Fuck it, they don't pay me enough!"
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped
on a talking scale and it told her "Sorry, we don't do livestock."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped
on a talking scale and it said "Please step out of the car."
Yo mama's so fat, she stepped
on a scale and she saw her phone number.
Yo mama's so fat, the last
time she saw 90210 she was on a scale.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
gets on the scale it says "To be continued."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
steps on a scale, it says "One at a time, please."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
weighed herself the scale gave her an equation.
Yo mama' so fat, she's moving
the Earth out of its orbit.
Yo mama's so fat, Yo father
didn't know whether to fuck her or take the burro ride down.
Yo mama's so fat, no one
can talk behind her back.
Yo mama's so fat, I gain
weight just by watching her eat.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
takes a shower, her feet don't get wet.
Yo mama's so fat, she's got
her own zip code.
Yo mama's so fat, she was
floating in the ocean and Spain claimed her as a new world.
Yo mama's so fat, she went
to the movies and sat next to everyone.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't
reach her back pocket.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't
wear Dazzey Dukes. She has to wear Boss Hoggs.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to iron her pants on the driveway.
Yo mama's so fat, her tailor
takes her measurements in light years.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
comes down the stairs she measures on the Richter scale.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
goes to a restaurant, she even orders "Thank You, Come Again."
Yo mama's so fat, she eats
biscuits like tic tacs.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't
eat Wheat Thins, she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell
in love and broke it.
Yo mama's so fat, when yo
father fell in love with her he got lost.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
swims, she leaves stretch marks on the swimming pool.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
gets out of the car, she leaves stretch marks.
Yo mama's so fat, she leaves
stretch marks on the bathtub.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
fills up the tub, she fills up the tub.
Yo mama's so fat, she gets
clothes in three sizes: extra large, jumbo, and oh-my-god-it's-coming-towards-us!
Yo mama's so fat, she got
hit by a truck and asked "Who threw that rock?"
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to pull down her pants to get into her pockets.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
more nooks and crannies than a Thomas' English Muffin.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to buy two airline tickets.
Yo mama's so fat, she eats
pumpkin pies like Skittles.
Yo mama's so fat, when the
cashier at KFC asked what size bucket she wanted, she said the one on the
roof.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to grease her hands to get into her pockets.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
two stomachs: One for meat, one for vegetables.
Yo mama's so fat, she masturbates
reading cookbooks.
Yo mama's so fat, the shadow
of her ass weighs 50 pounds.
Yo mama's so fat, even her
shadow has stretch marks.
Yo mama's so fat, she needs
a roadmap to find her ass.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell
in the Grand Canyon and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped
up in the air and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumped
for joy and got stuck.
Yo mama's so fat, she measures
36 24 36, and the other arm is just as big.
Yo mama's so fat, the earth
orbits around her instead of the sun.
Yo mama's so fat, NASA orbits
satellites around her.
Yo mama's so fat, NASA is
going to use her to fill the hole in the ozone layer.
Yo mama's so fat, she plays
hopscotch like this: LA, Detroit, Seattle, NY.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
went to a dating service, they matched her up with Detroit.
Yo mama's so fat, I saw her
in New York, and when I told my friend in LA, he'd seen her too.
Yo mama's so fat, after she
got off the carousel, the horse limped for a week.
Yo mama's so fat, she puts
on her lipstick with a paint-roller.
Yo mama's so fat, she looks
like the Stay-Puff marshmallow man on steroids.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat
on the corner and the police came & said "Break it up!"
Yo mama's so fat, she can't
just work one corner, she has to work all four.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat
on a dollar and made change.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat
on four quarters and made a dollar.
Yo mama's so fat, her car
is made out of spandex.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to get out of the car to change the radio station.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to get out of the car to change gears.
Yo mama's so fat, she got
a "speed pass" for Dairy Queen.
Yo mama's so fat, she shows
up on radar.
Yo mama's so fat, she stood
in front of the Hollywood sign and it just said H d.
Yo mama's so fat, she had
to roll over 4 times just to get an even tan.
Yo mama's so fat, she tried
to get an all-over tan, and the sun burned out.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses
hula hoops to hold up her socks.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears
a hula-hoop for a belly-button ring.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses
a mattress for a maxi-pad.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses
a pillow case as a sock.
Yo mama's so fat, her skates
went flat.
Yo mama's so fat, her belly
button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters.
Yo mama's so fat, she wears
a VCR for a beeper.
Yo mama's so fat, she fell
off a boat and the captain yelled "Land Ho!"
Yo mama's so fat, she sat
on a rowing machine and it sank.
Yo mama's so fat, she went
to a Chinese Restaurant and ordered a 40oz. of gravy.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
48 midnight snacks.
Yo mama's so fat, she's on
both sides of the family.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't
tie her own shoes.
Yo mama's so fat, she eats
cereal out of a satellite dish.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat
in Big Foot and made it a lowrider.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
got on the bus she turned it into a low rider.
Yo mama's so fat, when I
tried to drive around her, I ran out of gas.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
walks down the street everyone yells "Earthquake!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she
walks down the street, you can hear her hips saying to each other "If you
let me by, I'll let you pass."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes of your show.
Yo mama's so fat, the only
thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.
Yo mama's so fat, the only
thing she lost at Jenny Craig was $29.95.
Yo mama's so fat, Jenny Craig
did a credit check.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
volunteered to clean cages at the zoo, people walked by and said "Look
at the elephant!"
Yo mama's so fat, the highway
patrol made her wear a "Caution! Wide Turn" sign.
Yo mama's so fat, she sat
on an Oreo and unlocked the magic.
Yo mama's so fat, they had
to baptize her at Sea World.
Yo mama's so fat, last time
she went to Sea World Shamu got a hard on.
Yo mama's so fat, she jumed
in da ocean and the whales started singing "We are family!"
Yo mama's so fat, when I
have sex with her I have to slap her ass and ride the wave in.
Yo mama's so fat, they changed
my Physics book to say "What goes up must come down, except Yo mama."
Yo mama's so fat, they use
the elastic in her underwear for bungee jumping.
Yo mama's so fat, she bungee
jumped and went straight to hell.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
bungee jumps, she brings down the bridge too.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses
a kiddie slide for a shoe horn.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses
blanket as a washcloth.
Yo mama's so fat, when her
beeper went off, people thought she was backing up.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
goes to the beach, little kids yell "Free Willy, Free Willy."
Yo mama's so fat, as a kid,
she couldn't play Hide-n-seek, just seek.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes
Free Willy look like a Tic-Tac.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
backs up she beeps.
Yo mama's so fat, she plays
pool with the planets.
Yo mama's so fat, she's taller
lying down.
Yo mama's so fat, the body
snatchers called home for backup.
Yo mama's so fat, the only
thing she can fit into at the clothing store is the dressing rooms.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
fell down the stairs, she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
to use sleeping bags for tube socks.
Yo mama's so fat, they had
to install speed bumps at the all-u-can-eat buffet.
Yo mama's so fat, she pulls
up a chair to an all-u-can-eat buffet.
Yo mama's so fat, when it
says all-u-can-eat it still ain't enough.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
sits around the house, she sits AROUND the house.
Yo mama's so fat, you can
pinch an inch on her forehead.
Yo mama's so fat, you can
smack it up, flip it, and rub it down all at the same time.
Yo mama's so fat, you could
go swimming in her bra.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
sits on my face I can't hear the stereo.
Yo mama's so fat, on a scale
of 1 to 10, she's a 747.
Yo mama's so fat, she has
a greater gravitational attraction than a black hole.
Yo mama's so fat, she uses
the carpet as a blanket.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
wears corduroy pants, the ridges don't show.
Yo mama's so fat, she made
Richard Simmons cry.
Yo mama's so fat, even Richard
Simmons laughs at her.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
saw a yellow bus going down the road she yelled "Hey! Stop that Twinkie."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
wears a red dress people yell "Hey Kool-Aid Man."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
wears a yellow raincoat, people call her "Taxi!"
Yo mama's so fat, when she
wears a yellow raincoat, kids think its the school bus.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
wears a purple sweater people call her "Barney."
Yo mama is so fat, when she
sits in a chair, the rolls on her legs, cover her feet like a blanket.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
went to the beach Greenpeace tried to drag her ass back in the water.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
went to get a water bed, they put a blanket across Lake Michigan.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
sat on a rainbow, Skittle's fell out.
Yo mama's so fat, and you're
so poor, when she comes in your house the tires pop.
Yo mama's so fat, she don't
know wether she's walking or rolling.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
tiptoes, everyone yells "Stampede!"
Yo mama's so fat, she get's
her toenails painted at Earl Schieb's.
Yo mama's so fat, but I fucked
her anyway.
Yo mama's so fat, when I
tried to fuck her I didn't know if I was hitting the hole or a roll.
Yo mama's so fat, when my
dog went to fuck her he had to peel too many fat rolls and said "Fuck It."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
fart the whole planet came out.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes
sumo wrestlers look anerexic.
Yo mama's so fat, her car
is made of spandex.
Yo mama's so fat, we're inside
her right now.
Yo mama's so fat, she makes
Big Bird look like a rubber duck.
Yo mama's so fat, one day
when she got in a fight the person fighting her got lost in her.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
wore a shirt with an AA on it, people thought it was American Airlines
biggest jet.
Yo mama's so fat, if she
were an airplane, she'd be a jumbo jet.
Yo mama's so fat, one day
she was lifting up her rolls and a car fell out.
Yo mama's so fat, Dr. Martens
had to kill 3 cows just to make her a pair of shoes.
Yo mama's so fat, she can't
stay on a basketball court for three seconds without getting called for
a key violation.
Yo mama so fat that she climbed
Mt. Fuji with one step.
Yo mama's so fat, all the
chairs in her house have seatbelts.
Yo mama's so fat, she smells
like bacon at 90 degrees.
Yo mama's so fat, and her
back is so crooked, when she lays down...people say "I didn't know we had
mountains."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
travels, she's gotta make two trips.
Yo mama's so fat, God created
her, and on tHe seventh day he rested.
Yo mama's so fat, they call
her "Big Fat Ho."
Yo mama's so fat, when she
was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks.
Yo mama's so fat, when she
was born, she didn't get a birth certificate, she got blue prints.
